I re-learned the value of training and coaching last weekend. Read how.
Warning: this column represents a peek ‘behind the curtain’ at me. If you don’t want that, don’t read this! I’ve been in business now as a professional sales trainer, speaker, and consultant for a long time. Nearly eight years now, in fact; my eighth anniversary will be on September 1. That’s nearly one-fifth of my life, and just over one-third of my career. That’s a long time to be “the expert.” Being “the expert” is a very heady thing, and as those of you who know me know well, modesty and humility have never been my most prominent personal characteristics.
That’s why it took me several years to decide that I wanted and needed help with part of my skill set. I have been doing public speaking since junior high school, and I’ve always gotten good marks and reviews. Still…..I felt that there was a level I wasn’t getting to. I’ve been telling you for nearly eight years that the biggest obstacle in sales is fear. Guess what? Fear was my biggest obstacle to overcome as well. With the help of two of the best speaking coaches in the world, Patricia Fripp (fripp.com) and Darren LaCroix, (darrenlacroix.com) I overcame my fears. There’s a lesson here for you, too, if you keep reading.
To make a long story short, I finally decided to take the proverbial plunge and attend a two-day coaching program for speakers like myself. The fact that the program was in Las Vegas didn’t hurt, to be frank. When I arrived and got to know my fellow coachees, I felt a bit out of place; most were Toastmasters and working on pure motivational speeches, while mine was very focused on selling skills. Moreover, aside from Fripp and LaCroix, I was the only professional speaker in the room.
When it was my turn to go, I got up and gave my 10 minute speech in my typical high-energy, rapid-fire style – and I got hammered. Well, maybe not hammered – Darren and Patricia were kind – but they definitely showed me numerous ways to communicate my message in a more audience-friendly fashion. As they talked, and as we ran through several segments of my program, I saw ways that I could improve. Change my message or my take on selling? No way. And they didn’t ask me to. Instead, they found ways that I could refine both the message and the way I communicated it to be more impactful.
As I went through the program and got to know the other speakers, I saw that each of us had to overcome our own fears and obstacles to get there. There was Erik, paralyzed from the chest down for the last 15 years. Erik was in a wheelchair (of course) and was traveling on his own for the first time in 16 years. For a man who once bought a one-way ticket to Southeast Asia with no real idea of where he was going and how to get back, this was a tremendous lifestyle change. One thing that Erik still had was a rapier wit and he spared no one. For instance, his advice to me before I went up for my last turn at the podium was, “Try to find some self-confidence, huh?”
There was LouAnn, who had been in a 20 year abusive marriage and rebuilt her life to be happily remarried, professionally successful, financially independent, and wanted to help other women like herself. There was Dan, who had been stigmatized as a ‘loser’ in childhood through a variety of aberrant activities including a game he invented called “dog poop golf” (want to know that story? Come to one of my programs and I’ll tell it), and has built a successful lean manufacturing consulting business. In fact, all of us had our own fears or obstacles to overcome in order to humble ourselves and submit to coaching.
Without belaboring the details, I’ll just say this: I’m one heck of a lot better speaker now. My thought process has been refined, my visual and verbal communication improved, and the ultimate beneficiaries will be YOU – at least those of you who see me speak live. More importantly, perhaps, I’ve been reminded of what you go through every time you enter the door to one of my workshops. It’s a humbling experience, and I won’t soon forget that lesson.
Will this be the last program like this I attend? No. Now that I’ve restarted my professional development, I’m not stopping.
Have I changed my philosophy on sales and selling? Not in the slightest. In fact, that message has been clarified, honed, and polished.
So, I go forward excited, enthusiastic, and frankly, with a heck of a lot of work to do. Thank you to Darren, to Patricia, to LouAnn, to Erik, to Dan, to Elaine, Jerry, Tom, and everyone else in the group that I didn’t thank in this article. I’m better at my job now. Good training and coaching does that for all of us. So, if you need help – whether I can provide it or not – I encourage you to reach out, get the help, and humble yourself. The real winner will be you.
